If I lay here

"My heart and my soul, I give you control. Consume me from the inside out."

I have been meditating on this song all week. It brings me so much comfort to know that He is in control, and that he is watching over me even at my lowest of lowest points. I want to be strong and brave and get out of this place in one piece and sane but everyday is really a test. I have never looked forward to the end of a month so much before and 24th October seriously needs to come sooner.

In the mean time, this song shall be kept on repeat.

Doing a dance at my table after booking my tickets to Oslo. Hahaha, this is definitely the most exciting thing that happened on my otherwise mind numbingly boring Tuesday. Knowing that I would be seeing Jens in less than 25 days makes me so happy/excited. TAGGAD!

Jean’s birthday celebration part 2: Dinner at Fukuichi.

Always thankful for family time. I feel very blessed by everything that we have to give glory to God for. Looking forward to ending the year with multiple celebrations.

Favourite buy of the month: Asos Daddy Cool Trainers. 

In spite of the fact that I am living in tropical Singapore, I have been scoring really awesome Fall items at a steal. My two favourite buys this month are these trainers and a parka which would have been perfect together if I was in Sweden. Fall is one season I have yet to experience so I would have to wait till I experienced it for real before I know if I made good buys. 

In the mean time, I love how these trainers add a new twist to my typically girly wardrobe. My parents think that they are incredibly impractical because they are white but that is one of the reasons why I bought them, hahaha!

To be honest I have never dared to buy or wear a pair of shoes like this even though I really liked them because I felt that my calves were too chunky to pull them off. I don’t talk about this much but I always had issues with my body. There were certain incidents and people that affected me badly. I wish I was strong enough to let them go and move on with life but unfortunately I allowed those situations/people to influence the way I look at myself to the point where I really didn’t like what I saw in the mirror. Thankfully it never got to a point where I developed any disorders but it did make me feel miserable.

It has been a journey to reach to this point where I managed to break out of it but I am happy that those days are behind me and I have been slowly but surely regaining confidence in myself and accepting/loving the way I was created. I guess that is why these pair of shoes are particularly special to me and I want to rock them with a big smile on my face. 

Jeanbean’s Birthday Celebration Part 1: Dinner at Alforno on her actual birthday.

Of course the photos are specially meant to update the Chngs more than my blog per se but I do like them to share them here, complete with the Caity twists and all. 

Happy Birthday Jeanbean   

23 September: Team Hope Dinner at Peperoni Pizzeria.

So glad to have caught up with these girls over dinner outside of training. I am amazed at how even though we only got to know each other for three days, the nature of the training allowed us to get to know each other on such an intimate level such that catching up didn’t feel superficial. Don’t really know how to describe it properly but I am just super thankful for these girls:)

Looking forward to our next meetup!

"If we stop defining each other by what we are not and start defining ourselves by what we are—we can all be freer and this is what HeForShe is about. It’s about freedom."

This has been shared repeatedly on my timeline and I am glad I watched it. It is great that she is putting her influence to good use, so much respect. 

20 September: Shopping in town with Mum.

Had a really fun girly day out with my mum on Saturday to look for outfits for my brother’s wedding. While I didn’t manage to find a single dress I felt inclined to try, I am glad that my mum managed to score two outfits for the wedding. I know how much this has been weighing on her mind and I was quite worried that we may not be able to find anything suitable but I am so glad that we eventually did.

My bro and Moe came down to give their second opinion on the two outfits we shortlisted. My brother didn’t like the day outfit but because everyone else including Caity (who saw the dress via Skype) liked it, my mum got it. Thankfully the evening outfit received an immediate stamp of approval from everyone so we bought it immediately. 

Now it is my turn to stress out over my outfits!